An Equation To Connect Your Child To God - Part 1
“For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb
1 I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
These are the words every Jesus-loving parent wants their child to sing to God; the ultimate declaration of worth. Words of humility, significance, and self-worth all wrapped around their truest selves in Christ.
The words of this Psalm sing like a doxology of confident self-knowing that cannot help but overflow into close connection with the One who loves and cherishes us. Into the truest kind of worship.
How is it that we’ve overlooked this chorus when it comes to raising kids?
Instead we’ve emphasized behavior and discipline and towing the line. Good things— yes, even essential for a life of discipleship— but certainly not enough to connect your child into what Jesus called “a rich relationship with God”. (Luke 12v21)
And that’s the goal, isn’t it? In our recently released book, Raising Passionate Jesus Followers, we explain further:
“Let’s go back to the beginning of God’s story of redemption, to a section of Scripture scholars call the Great Shema. These words were recorded at a time when God was issuing urgent orders to His people.”
“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.”
“This was God’s all inclusive, all in-compassing command to the children of Israel: dive into the depths of God with every fiber of your being. No half measures, no passive acceptance. God was looking for all-out committed followers. His intent was to show the world what could happen when a whole nation of people chose to worship the one true God and do life the way He designed it.
But before these bedraggled ex-slaves could catch their collective breath, He turned to the parents and made another sweeping statement:”
“These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit in your home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”
“God gives these clear commands to His people, and then He immediately turns to the parents and says, “Now you teach these things to your children!”
Why the parents? Why not the priests or teachers or anyone else?
Because no one knows your child like you do! You’ll spend the best years of your life watching and nurturing and guiding that child into the fully formed human God had in mind when He made him.
And since you, Mom and Dad, know your child better than anyone else, you are uniquely positioned to speak the truth of this Psalm into the soul of your child.
You know what makes her giggle, what causes him to sit up and pay attention. You know what to whisper in your child’s ear to induce a smile and how to motivate him to do what needs doing.
Of course you do!
And you can use that knowledge to connect your child’s heart to the Father who delights in your son, who relishes your daughter for who she is.
How? By this simple equation:
Knowing God + Understanding Your Child + Everyday Discipleship = Connection to God.
Now, if you’re one of those people who eschew formulas and guarantees, let me assure you, this is not a slick slogan. Rather, it is a summary of years and decades of study and learning and searching the Scriptures. As well as just trying to figure out how to bring my own children into a “rich relationship with God.” (Luke 12v21)
And because I remember feeling unfit for this. How in the world was I to connect my firstborn son to Jesus?
From an early age John Mark was smarter than me, asked questions constantly, and had in inborn, God-given need to question everything. Now, as an adult, he loves nothing more than to upset the proverbial apple cart by challenging old paradigms of thinking that aren’t rooted in Scripture.
Whereas I’d rather make people comfortable than challenge them. No rocking the boat for me. Creating new paradigms is nowhere on my radar screen. Much too messy and fraught with conflict.
So how would my peace-loving brand of following Jesus compute with my emerging firebrand of a son? Obviously, I had to learn how to connect my son in a way that worked for who he is. And, just as obviously, I had to learn things about who God is in order to meet John Mark’s craving for things I was uncomfortable with. And then I needed to know what to do when.
So for the next few weeks I’m going to elaborate on Knowing God, Understanding Your Child, and Everyday Discipleship and how these work together to connect our children to God.
Then I’ll walk with your through the stages of your child’s life and development and what you can intentionally do in your unique role as a father or mother to fulfill your greatest commission.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you’ve made knowing God, understanding your child, or everyday discipleship a reality in your home. These are topics best learned in community!
Learning together with you,
Diane